Strengthen Your Business by Earning Your Ph.D. in ‘Laundrology’
I recently got the idea to add a new category to the long list of scientific “-ology” subjects that exist in our world today. I’ve decided to create a brand new discipline and call it “laundrology,” which henceforth will be referred to as the practice of owning and operating a self-service laundry.
Of course, you, as a laundromat owner, logically will now be known as a professional “laundrologist.” Makes sense, right?
Taking this line of thinking one step further, if you were to study the self-service laundry industry very seriously, in my view you could qualify for the equivalent of a Ph.D. in this bustling new field I’ve just created.
Clearly, as is the case with all advanced degrees, there needs to be a curriculum of courses that must be taken in order to graduate. Therefore, I thought I’d provide what I believe to be the five required areas of study – as well as the recommended textbooks (each of which are readily available at Amazon) to read in order for you to pass these courses. But don’t worry – no exams are required.
My logic behind the study of these five important areas is that the more advanced knowledge you possess about the business and its clientele, the better your self-service laundry will be. This, in turn, will enhance your customers’ experiences when they visit your store. And, hopefully, they will spread the word, and your laundry can go on to become the equivalent of “viral” in your trade area.
Since I assume you know the laundry basics, the advanced courses indicated here will take you to the next level of knowledge and performance.
Let’s begin:
Course One: The Broad Cultural Diversity of Laundry Customers
The current population of the United States features approximately 319 million people, and is racially and ethnically diverse. What’s more, this diversity is expected to become significantly wider in the years to come.
According to U.S. Census data, the country currently is about 62 percent Caucasian, 18 percent Hispanic, 12 percent African-American and 6 percent Asian. The remaining 2 percent is comprised of a mixture of cultures, including Native Americans and Alaska Natives.
There are two books required for this class. The first one is “The Geography of Thought,” by Richard Nisbett. It provides an interesting and useful overview of how Asians and Westerners think differently. Of course, this could have many implications for your overall marketing strategies, including the direction of advertising campaigns and the development of loyalty programs.
The second textbook for this course is “Multicultural Marketing,” by Alfred L. Schreiber. And this tome explains how to position your business today for optimal success in the diverse America of tomorrow.
Course Two: Evaluating Your Business in a Constantly Changing World
The best and most fascinating book on this subject is “The Road to Reinvention,” by Josh Linkner, in which the author explains how success isn’t about cracking the code once and enjoying the spoils forever. Instead, as he indicates, it’s a moving target that we have to hit again and again.
This book will help you to learn how to constantly re-evaluate your laundry business and make required creative changes when necessary.
Course Three: Making Your Self-Service Laundry Absolutely Remarkable
The required reading for this course is “The Purple Cow,” by Seth Godin. In this wonderful book, Godin explains that the key to success is finding a way to stand out – or, in other words, to be the purple cow in a field of monochrome Holsteins. It will completely change the way you think about how you present your laundry business to your customers.
Course Four: Becoming a Laundry Marketing Wonder
For this class, you’ll need to read “Marketing Outrageously,” by Jon Spoelstra. He explains how to increase your revenue by staggering amounts through the implementation of the many amazing and interesting marketing ideas he presents in detail.
In this book, Spoelstra shows how marketing outrageously is fun – and how it’s all about using your imagination, dropping your assumptions and starting over with a fresh point of view.
Course Five: Understanding Customer Generational Diversity
The required text for this final course before graduation is “Boomers, Xers and Other Strangers,” by Dr. Rick and Kathy Hicks.
This book is a terrific path toward developing a strong grasp of the generational differences that divide us. Understanding generational divides is just as important as understanding cultural diversity. Learning to do so will enable you to produce effective, attention-grabbing advertising and provide the type of laundry environment that will appeal to these various age groups.
It also will help you to better understand and relate with your attendants so that you and they are on the same page when it comes to the workplace milieu, as well as your employees’ relationships with your customers.
So, there you have it. That’s the curriculum and required course reading to earn your Ph.D. in laundrology. Believe me, it will be well worth the effort to complete this program and have those books in your library. Those of you who take the time to do so will be in the position to create a remarkable self-service laundry business that customers will actively seek out like never before.
If you complete this curriculum (on the honor system, of course) and read every book listed above, simply email me and write the word “laundrology” in the subject line. Describe your experience in taking the five courses and what you’ve learned that you plan to apply to your business – and I promise to send you an actual diploma, proclaiming your advanced degree in laundrology.
By the way, there’s no need to rent a graduation gown and funny hat this time around.
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